The Problem of Childlike Boys: Peter Pan Syndrome

The name of the syndrome comes from the novel “Peter Pan” by British writer James Matthew Barrie, published in 1912. The character of the novel, Peter Pan, who refuses to grow up, actually carries important parts of the author’s own private life. The author, who created the fantasy land called “Neverland” in the work, emphasizes his desire to remain a child by taking shelter here. It is also known that James Matthew Barrie, who reflects the pains of his own development process in the work, had a sexual identity crisis in his youth.

The definition of this syndrome, which suffers from those who have problems with growth, was first used by Psychoanalyst Dr. It was made by Dan Kiley in 1983 but still is not recognized as a true disease by the DSM-IV (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders).

This syndrome, which can continue even at the age of 30, creates adult-looking children and negatively affects the psychology of individuals who do not grow up.

The syndrome, which occurs at the age when social tasks begin to intensify, is more common in individuals who were exposed to maternal pressure and non-authoritarian fathers as children. Children who are raised with a baby rose by an overprotective family are more likely to encounter this situation in the future.

This syndrome is usually seen in males. Since women who are with this type of men start to act possessive and take on the role of mother in the relationship, this situation becomes tiring for women.

What kind of symptoms are seen at what ages?

• 11-12 years: Behaving irresponsibly. Failure to perform simple self-care skills.
• 13-14 years: Not getting along with the social environment, not caring about anyone.
• 15-16 years: Loneliness caused by the thought of getting the approval of peers and fear of rejection.
• Ages 17-18: Desire for parental consent. Depression. Loneliness in society.
• 19-20 years: Anger, addiction, narcissism.
• 21-22 years: Sexist behaviors. Emotional insecurity.
• 22-30 years: Social inactivity. Emotional paralysis. After
• 30: An unhappy individual who has run away from responsibilities, distanced himself from himself, and refused to act like an adult.

So what kind of behaviors do individuals who suffer from this syndrome display in daily life?

• If an event is going to be held, they always leave the job of organizing it to others.
• They haven’t been washing the dishes for days, they don’t throw away the garbage immediately and collect it.
• They are not good at spending money, they spend money like children without thinking about tomorrow.
• They cannot keep up with business life; They are often late for work, they do not complete their tasks on time.
• They think that they will come to very good places without making great efforts.
• They have a thought about being looked after.
• They are not emotionally mature.
• They avoid events by joking about serious matters.

It is because of such behaviors that people who suffer from Peter Pan Syndrome often become unhappy adults.

Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5